Dating Woes

I have been single, technically, for well over 2 years. Over the last 5-6 years I was involved with someone. We were basically dating (he just didn’t want to admit that) and throughout that time I pretty much only involved myself with him. Fast forward to today and I am a single mom who is terrified of getting back on the dating scene.

There are multiple reasons why…

As I said previously, I was super wrapped up in this last guy. Ok..not my exact words but I was definitely tangled in him. We did not end on the best of terms and a lot of emotional damage was done. A TON. After that, I vowed to just focus on healing and making sure my child and I had everything we needed. With everything my heart had been thru, I was not even the least bit concerned with dating. Add a baby on top of that and men haven’t even had a chance to flirt with me let alone I actually talk to someone as a love interest. Nope. No way. Not happening. I fail to mention the pandemic that has caused social distancing to become the new norm. How in thee hell am I supposed to meet people when I’m too nervous or scared to allow anyone to get 12 feet from me. (6 feet isn’t enough.)

Healing. A baby. Career goals. Spiritual goals. A pandemic.

Who has time to date?!?!

As I’ve asked myself that question, I still wonder how to approach dating now that I have a child. Am I even dateable while she is this young? Should I wait? How long do I wait, if I wait? I’ve been back and forth. And you can’t trust people like that so do I date someone I should’ve given a chance years ago or start fresh? Y’all. It makes my head hurt when I think about it. I don’t want to be single forever and I know that God has created this hunk of a man I’ve been praying for. But my behind is going to miss out on him with this fear of dating I have. I have learned from previous failed situationships and my standards have definitely changed when it comes to men. No, I don’t require that they make x amount of dollars a year or drive a particular vehicle. All of that is materialistic and if you know me, you know I could give an ish about any of that stuff. You can’t be out here broke but y’all get what I’m saying. I’m more interested in where his mind is, how does he tend to his mental health, does he care for his spiritual self and is he working towards a bigger goal in his life.

Being a single mama and thinking of dating is scary. My constant prayer is that God send me exactly who He knows I need. I pray daily for my future husband, but sometimes what I think I need and what I actually need are two different things so…God just fills in the gaps for me. Everything works out the way it’s supposed to. It always does. I’ll just keep being awesome out here in the mean time…

Loving yourself is one of the best gifts for your soul ❤️

Self Care: Make it happen

“Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are”
— Marilyn Monroe

As some of you may know and for those of you that don’t, I am a new single mama. This 8 month old requires so much more attention, energy and time than I could have ever expected. While I am completely willing and obligated to give that to her, it can be easy to forget about your own needs in the process. There is a saying that goes “You can’t pour into someone else’s cup if yours is empty.” And it’s true. There is no way that I can take care of her at full capacity if I’m running around on fumes. As difficult as it has been, I have created a self-care routine to make sure I can physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally give my all towards her and everything that I am doing.

How you take care of your body MATTERS.

I do my best to practice good, clean whole food eating while also making sure I am using products that are safe for my child, me and the environment. Where I run into the problem is WHEN I can actually eat. I have my mothers help but most times it is just us at home. I’m making sure she isn’t getting into the dog food bowl (that’s her thing now 🤦🏾‍♀️), nursing her to sleep, washing clothes, cleaning, getting work done…half the day will have gone by and I haven’t eaten. Your food needs the proper nourishment and nutrients to function and being a breastfeeding mama, I need double. Making sure I get that has become a top priority in my daily self care duties. Without food you lack energy, you’re cranky and it just doesn’t feel good to be hungry. It is a daily struggle but I am still doing my best to map out times to eat and get snacks during the day.

Not only is your food and nutrient intake important, but your skincare routine matters just the same. There are a mirage of products that you can use for daily and weekly skincare. I will share a few below that have given me major improvement that I highly recommend. You’re welcome 😊

https://garnersgarden.com/products/eczema-relief-soap
https://urbanskinrx.com/collections/cleansers-exfoliators/products/clear-complexion-cleansing-bar
https://myminimo.com/collections/acne-regimen/products/honeydew-day-night-moisture-cream

Now, for my spiritual and mental health I lean on quite a few things. My walk with God has been a constant and while I may fall to the wayside, as we all do, I hold tightly to my faith thru any circumstance. This didn’t happen overnight and it can be difficult to hold on to when you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. At one point, I was seeing a therapist for a couple of years but it’s been a while since I’ve been to him. Please, please if you have or experience feelings of hopelessness or things start to feel overwhelming..there is so much help out there for you. Especially during this Covid Era. You can even reach out to me and I’ll help in whatever I can. I listen to Oprah’s Soul Sessions via Spotify for encouragement and I also have a daily devotional, pictured below.

Available on Amazon for $11.39

These are just a few things I have done my best to incorporate into my daily and weekly self care routines. Being a mother whether single or married, is tough work. We can so easily forget our needs because we have so many other things that need to be taken care of. Don’t forget about yourself. You still matter, mama ❤️

Until next time, smile your way thru it all.

The Truth of My Life

If you’re reading this…

Stop wasting time because you have a limited amount of time to do what you have to do. Make the DECISION to step into the truth of your life.

— Oprah.

In my life, I’ve learned that people will appreciate you more for simply being who you are. There are way too many of us trying to duplicate things that have already been done. The world will love you more for who you ALREADY ARE. It took me years to realize that. Honesty begins within. The moment you are able to be honest with yourself, it will make your connections with other human beings more genuine and allow for more true connections to take place.

Becoming pregnant is initially what sparked my interest in creating a blog. I had been receiving so many comments on my level of transparency during this time, that I decided to go ahead and create a platform where I can continue to share my truth with a broader audience. This blog will cover my experiences as a pregnant professional dancer, a first time mom, a single mom and so much more. You will learn my story and become part of my world and I am so excited to allow you in. I may not be the conventional blogger and that is completely fine with me.

I won’t hold back! I can only hope that me sharing my story will inspire someone out there to know that being true to your story is what will help you grow, no matter how many flaws your story has.

Welcome to Life with Loren Marie!

Click the subscribe button below to stay current with what Loren Marie has to share! I will be posting product reviews along with a plethora of other things that you don’t want to miss out on!

Introducing…

Loren Marie.

When I moved to Houston about 12 years ago, I came here with 0 intention. I know, you probably weren’t expecting me to say that. But it’s true. I did not have any idea of what I wanted to do or who I wanted to become. I was really unsure of my true purpose in life.

I grew up dancing but didn’t pursue it as a career until a little over 5 years ago. I also began teaching around that time. I originally went to Texas Southern University but soon realized that was not what I was passionate about. Dance was my true passion. It was always dance and out of fear, I chose not to do what I was destined to do. In 2012, I attended Houston Community College where my life would soon be changed forever. I received my Associates degree and have had such an amazing career in dance from being a company member travelling and performing to working with youth everywhere to give them everything that I’ve acquired over the years in the professional dance world.

In 2019, my career and life took a major shift. I FOUND OUT I WAS PREGNANT. As a dancer who did not have a baby in future plans, this hit me pretty hard. It is also the same reason I decided to create this blog. There are so many women who need to know that there are others in the world that understand what they are going thru.

I am women. She is me. This blog will cover topics like pregnancy along with:

  • Being a first time mommy
  • The transition of a dancer into pregnancy and motherhood
  • Relationships (family, friends and everything in between)
  • Product reviews
  • …and more

If you are interested in a collaboration, do not hesitate to contact me via email. You can also find me on Instagram and Facebook. I will be creating a Twitter account soon and will let you all know when it is posted and ready to tweet!